....

Now after going back and reflecting on everything that was said and done and how certain things could've been done differently to avoid problems, I realized that the main reason I stressed myself so much and repeated things was because you never seemed to get my intial point or the good intentions behind it. Behind why I wanted us to find the loopholes in the system and avoid the typical/society robot lifestyle, getting caught up in a neverending cycle; feeding into it, perpetuating it. And your friends and my dislike of them and how I realized that some of them were fake and had hidden motives, which reminded much of just how people work in general. And I'm sorry for trying to seclude you from society and the true nature of people; I'm sorry I became protective and my dislike of humanity affected me to that extent. But I feel like if you would've understood where I was coming from and not just payed attention to how I was going about it, then we could've united together and found solutions. Instead of just leaving everything unresolved. One of my main intentions was unity in doing things right. And yes, my mind overwhelms me too, I am attentive to pretty much everything I come in contact with. But I have learned that some things are not worth wasting my time on. I have this thirst for knowledge and I love, absolutely love, attaining and distributing it. My quest for helping find ultimate truths started from an early on age, and I had tried to explain this all to you. But you never really cared to listen to my story, you never even really cared about me. So I was wasting my time with you too. I had been misunderstood a lot because of how different I truly was. People didn't really operate like me or were as attentive to things as I was. Everyone else just seemed to follow what other people were doing and I hated that; it was like zombies, the brainwashed masses feeding into the system like brain dead zombies. I realized this from an early on age, how people were tailored to fit certain needs and different things; how the education system was set up. I payed attention to all the details surrounding things and took note of everything mentally. I started trying to stitch together the pieces myself and try and find some relief from all of this. An escape. But I seeemd to always find myself trapped in the midst of it, surrounded by these hoards of zombies. And then I slowly started realizing the truth about everything and the true nature of people and it affected me. I became dissapointed in people and even ashamed to call myself human. I perpetually felt like I didn't belong anywhere. Until I met you, and our amazing connection sparked, and your arms felt like coming home. I felt complete, I had found my security; my certainty. What I had been searching for. But after some time, you seemed to misunderstand me like other people did. And our miscommunication caused fights and what not. That led to us forming ill interpretations of each other. When we were really just desperately trying to be understood. But it was a learning process, we were learning to do things right. We were trying to get to know each other so we could mesh together better and work as a team supporting each other.

If there weren't solid facts, a reason to garner knowledge and try to find evidence, then there wouldn't be a reason to do anything or learn anything. Because nothing would be true and are we even exisiting? That sounds like a load of bull to me; there is reason, there is certainty. This is what we strive towards. But because people are highly ignorant creatures, brainwashed, and what not; we have all of these clashing heads and misinformation being distributed; when we should just be focusing on the facts, our basis of ultimate truths.

And then we realize why so many things are being done wrong; because people aren't right.